5 signs you might need a marriage counsellor

The COVID-19 pandemic has posed serious challenges for many couples. Health worries, financial stress, cramped living quarters, and limited social interactions with others can put a lot of pressure on a marriage, especially if there are children involved.

A professional couples' counsellor can help you navigate life’s challenging periods and strengthen your relationship. But it can be difficult to know when to seek help and how to convince your significant other to take part in the healing process. If you’re feeling unhappy with your relationship, here are five signs you might benefit from speaking with a marriage counsellor.

[Photo Credit: Prostock-studio]

1. Frequent fighting
 
Are you blowing up at your partner over small, insignificant things? Do you find you’re having the same argument over and over again? If you want to save your marriage, a marriage counsellor can help uncover what’s causing the breakdown in communication by identifying the underlying issues and emotions behind your recurrent disagreements.

2. You’re keeping secrets from one other
 
A solid romantic partnership is built on trust. Lying or hiding the truth from your partner can be a sign of serious dysfunction. When lies and secrets threaten the foundation of a marriage, a professional therapist can help couples become more open and honest in their communication and learn how to trust one another again.
________________________________________________________________________

Need help communicating with your loved ones? Let YP recommend qualified Marriage, Individual, Couples & Family Counsellors in your local area.

_________________________________________________________________________

  
3. Lack of intimacy
 
For couples in long-term relationships, it’s common for sexual desire to fluctuate over the years. If the absence of affection and physical intimacy becomes a concern in your relationship, a marriage counsellor can uncover the root of the problem and suggest ways for you and your partner to reignite that spark of passion.
 
4. A major life change

Moments of crisis and dramatic change will strain any relationship. Major events like a death in the family, job loss, serious illness, or a move across the country can be a struggle to cope with. These transitions can be easier to navigate together with the support and guidance of an objective third-party.
 
5. You’ve lost interest in the relationship
 
You know what they say, the opposite of love isn’t hate — it’s indifference. While fighting constantly can be a sign your relationship needs work, the absence of arguments might be equally problematic. If you find yourself feeling apathetic towards your partner, it might be time to enlist the help of a marriage counsellor. A good marriage counsellor encourages open and honest communication between couples, so they can work through their problems, express their emotions, and set out strategies to move forward in the relationship.

However, marriage counselling requires buy-in from both individuals in the relationship. If your spouse is hesitant about working with a marriage counsellor, here are some techniques to help convince them to join you on the journey:

●        Pick your moment. Don’t bring up the idea of couples therapy in the middle of a fight. Instead, broach the subject during an amicable interaction so that it’s clear your intentions are coming from a place of love.

●        Be vulnerable and honest about your emotions. Tell your partner how you’re feeling and be direct in how they can support you.

●        Acknowledge their concerns so they feel understood. You may need to educate your partner on how marriage counselling works or dispel some of the negative beliefs they hold about the process.

●        Take a team approach. Work together to choose a counsellor and set your objectives for the relationship.